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About

A second blog. A new look. A fresh start. A new lease. A new voice. A new life.

Change is inevitable, but in it all, it's still... Just me =)

Disclaimers

The opinions expressed here is entirely based on my personal tastebuds and may vary for others. So read as you like.. I gladly accept all rebukes and appraisals!!

All poems and photos displayed here are properties of Incessant Crepitations.
All rights reserved.
No part of this blog may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever.
DO NOT pirate without permission or suffer the consequences!!!
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The run Wednesday 29 December 2010 |

Just got my rota today.

Apparently I'll be doing registrar calls on and off starting next month.

As grateful as I am for the promotion, I fear, in similar manner, of the seniors' wrath.

How can they make me registrar before those who are 3-4 years my senior??!?!

I sense, an uproar.



At times like this, all I can do is just to remain still.... And pray.

For Him to give me wisdom to do the best for the patients... And correctly.

For Him to bring peace to those who feels injustice has been done.

For Him to guide my heart to mend the broken fences.

For Him, to show me, what He sees in me, thru His eyes.

For Him, to give me faith to believe that this is His will, and I will follow.



He has brought me back here.

He has seen me walk so far.

And now, I need to run.



 In Him, I believe.



Time to put on the running shoes.



- jess -

Forever Tuesday 21 December 2010 |






Sad, but painfully true.


And yet, we still wish for forever, like in fairytales.



*Sigh..*




-jess, in want of forever-

Twenty eight Thursday 9 December 2010 |



It's been a long year.



I went thru a difficult time in the relationship, one which, in the end, I was forced to let go.

It was not easy, mending this broken heart.

It made me rethink a lot about relationships, and whether I was actually going down the wrong path, in the first place.

And now, after almost a year, I can finally say it's ok, I forgive myself, and move on.

And yes, I still think about you, sometimes.

And that's ok too.



I made the big move back to the big city, a year of the long awaited transfer.

I initially requested for the transfer was because you were there, but I suppose the transfer came in a minute too late.

You were no longer here.

But I do not regret coming back.

As rocky as this stomping ground may be, I am here to walk my worth, and grow up.

Cause this, is just the beginning of my long career path.

And I AM READY.



I faced my worst nightmare this year.

Failing the exams, TWICE.

For a high end achiever like me, that was a big blow to the ego.

And yet, the entire experience was enriching.

I am now, more humble.

And more receptive to my own weaknesses.

And realize, that things, will not work the way I want it to....

If I do not work for it.



I cheated death this year.

I could've been badly injured in the accident, yet I wasn't.

God saved me for greater purposes.

This second chance, I will not let it go to waste.

I will be wiser, this time around.




Too much heartache, too much worries, too much what ifs.

But I'm glad that you guys were there every step of the way.

Thank you, for being there when I call in the middle of the night, crying.

Thank you, for taking the time and effort to make me laugh and smile again.

Thank you, for lending me a shoulder to cry on, and open arms ever ready for a hug.

To my small yet irreplaceable bunch of angels, I just wanted to say that I love you guys so, so much.



I am now 28.

And I am glad to declare, it was a very becoming year.

Hence, I am proud to say, I'm no longer THAT 27 year old.



I will not say that I am perfect, far from it, but to speak more of acceptance, that it's ok to be imperfect.

And the biggest revelation ever?

That others will STILL love me, despite my imperfections.

Because they SEE me, and beyond.

And know that I'm deserving, even if I don't vouch for myself.

Because they, BELIEVE in me.


And because they do, I should too.






"Because every woman deserves flowers on her birthday."
-Token of love from the best friend-



-jess, twenty eight-

Hands Saturday 4 December 2010 |



I see, these scarred hands.


The skin, wearing away, from the repeated washings.

The rashes, that never goes away, perpetuated by being allergic to gloves.

The stiff fingers, that cramps from being confined too often in small spaces.

The veins, enlarged and ghastly, from overexertion of strength.

The trembles, from holding unto instruments for too long at a time.

The palms, that are no longer soft, but bearing close resemblance to sawdust.




These, are my hands.

They may be worn out, but they remind me, daily...

That they ARE the hands...

That brings life to the world.



So scarred, as they may be...

I am proud, to call them...

Beautiful.